Wednesday, October 5, 2011

worry

I am amazed how much I can worry about a small black bundle of fur that I have never even touched.

Nahum and I hold a vigil for BK. 

Typically BK is fairly active, roaming around the neighborhood, hunting prey, etc. He's always right by the door in the morning waiting for his breakfast. But lately, he hasn't done any of these activities.

BK has been very sickly these last few days. He didn't eat any of the food I have put out for several days and he seems very lethargic. He rarely leaves his house, although on Wednesday, he was hunched in a ball right outside the door to his house for several hours. He looked extremely uncomfortable and in misery. Eventually as the rain picked up, he went back inside.

It's been raining a lot lately, and I've been reluctant to try to approach him for fear he would run off and then just be miserable in the rain somewhere. He always runs off when I try to get near.

The other day, after seeing him motionless in his house all day, I decided to do a health and wellness check to see if he was still alive. As I approached his house, he shot out the door and jumped the 6 foot fence. I immediately retreated and felt terrible for scaring him but thankful he was still alive. After only a few minutes he was back in his house.

Seeing BK suffering only ten feet from the window and being powerless to help him kills me. I tried to comfort my misery with the thought that at least he is suffering in a dry and safe place. I also took a good chunk of time on Wednesday to sit by the window and gaze out at him, wishing him well and sending him prayers. During that time Nahum came up to me and crawled in my lap, which is very fitting, as he is very sensitive to the well being of others.

In the early evening I happened to notice BK enter the Dining Hall, he gobbled up his previously untouched breakfast. Seeing this brought me great joy and relief! And now, several hours later, I see him walking around the yard and actively patrolling his territory.

I sure hope this is a sign that he's feeling better. I'm not sure I can take another day filled with so much worry and misery.

5 comments:

  1. We think that the misery shows you are a VERY caring person.....mom gets worried too on those nights when the weather is so bad and she knows there are peoples and animals out there with no shelter and no one to care about them. We are glad BK appears to be back to normal - maybe he ate a funky mouse. :)

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  2. gosh, that is something to worry about and we know our Mum would be just the same and agitate over him all the time. We can't think that you can do more than you are, but we wish you could get close to touch him one day. At least you are giving shelter and food. Fingers crossed for him. Darcy and Bingley xx

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  3. It hurts so much not to be able to help him but you are! Giving him a safe, warm and dry place and food. Sounds like he is feeling better.

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  4. You are a caring bean. But by giving BK a warm, dry place to sleep, and regular food, you have already made his life a lot better.

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